Forgiveness – Glenwood Church of Christ

How do we forgive when we have been seriously hurt or injured by someone we love or was supposed to love us? I’m not going to lie. This is a very difficult thing to do. But there is hope. With the help of God, all things are possible. And you may need to seek professional help.

But if you hear nothing else, please hear this. You are precious in the eyes of God. You were created in God’s image. You were woven in your mother’s womb. In other words, God formed your DNA. He wanted you to be born. You are not an accident. Your parents might have had an accidental pregnancy. But you were no accident. And your value isn’t determined by other’s actions. Your value is determined by your heavenly Father. Please know that sad isn’t bad. While it is very sad that you were seriously hurt. You are not bad. You are not guilty of their mistakes.

So how do you move on? How do you release your anger and resentment? One thing that might help is to remind yourself that as a child of God you are commanded to forgive. Not only forgive them, but in other verses were told to pray for them. This may seem ridiculous at first. But if you consider that God is a God that gave his Son for you, you know how much he loves you. He’s not asking you to do this for no reason. Obviously, there must be a better reason. But what could that reason be? Could it be that God knows what you need most is to turn your pain over to him. And let him carry it for you? Could it be through prayer you can speak directly to Jesus. Who knows what it is to be innocent and to suffer, even to die, having done nothing wrong.

I think another thing we must remember is that forgiveness is not acting as if what was done is okay. Or acting as if it never happened. Forgiveness does not remove any punishment they may have to serve for breaking the law. Forgiveness does not allow them to pull you down. It’s like trying to save someone who is drowning. If they try and drown you with them, you are not required to save them. That is not love. That is foolishness.

There is an old Chinese proverb that says, “He who seeks revenge should remember to dig two graves.” The longer you hold resentment and anger inside of you, you are burying yourself alive. In the first chorus of “Burdens are lifted at calvary,” it says,

Days are filled with sorrow and care

Hearts are lonely and drear
Burdens are Lifted at Calvary
Jesus is very near

Remember surrendering to Jesus at calvary is where your burdens are lifted. And as you grow closer to God, he draws closer to you. Jesus becomes near. I am very sorry others didn’t see the value in you or live up to their responsibilities. But the truth is, if you don’t release it, you will end up drowning in it. And if you’re not careful, you will pass down the same guilt to your children one day. To break the curse, you must learn to forgive.

In Colossians 3:13 Christians are told “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”

Forgiveness is neither easy nor clear-cut, as many of us have found out when we are deeply hurt. I have experienced murder in my family. It is hard thing to forgive the person who took the life of your loved one. I have been abandoned by some, laughed at by others and sold short by others. Many of you have experienced the same or worse.

Why does God command that we forgive others. If you know anything about God, it’s for our benefit. God only wants the best for you and me. I believe one reason is, because without forgiveness you can never be fully free. Hatred is of the devil. So, you will either choose to serve the devil or your heavenly father. The bible is clear, no man can serve two masters.

If you allow anger to build up inside of you, your enemy the devil has won. Your anger will turn to hatred, and as a result, all of humanity loses. The way a society goes will be determined largely by the grace it offers.

Forgiveness is the required step to a grace filled life. Does this mean we forget. No. Does this mean what they did was ok. Absolutely not. Does this mean we should seek their release from prison. No.

In his book The Prisoner and the Bomb, Laurens van der Post recounts the misery of his wartime experiences in a Japanese prison camp in Java. He writes, “The only hope for the future lay in an all-embracing attitude of forgiveness of the peoples who had been our enemies. Forgiveness, my prison experience had taught me, was not mere religious sentimentality; it was as fundamental a law of the human spirit as the law of gravity. If one broke the law of gravity one broke one’s neck; if one broke this law of forgiveness, one inflicted a mortal wound on one’s spirit and became once again a member of the chain-gang of mere cause and effect from which life has labored so long and painfully to escape.”

Why is our society so full of anger, and hatred? Why do we seem so divided? Could a large part of it be due to the lack of our willingness to forgive. Forgiveness does not come to us easily. We must work at it. It is a choice we must learn to make as painful as it can be. We have to see the necessity of it for the greater good of society. A society that doesn’t practice grace is a society that is doomed to fail. If the church wants to make an impact on the world, it must learn to practice forgiveness. How many of our churches have split over refusal to forgive. Where did that practice come from? I can surely say it did not come from God. For he commanded us to forgive. His Son dying words from the cross were “Father Forgive them”.

Will you take a step today to practice a grace filled life. A life of forgiveness. Ask God today to help you forgive. Lord, please forgive me when I allow anger and bitterness to fill my heart when I refuse to forgive someone who has hurt me. Teach me Lord to forgive as you have forgiven me.